Noticing “Bad” Traits

Hello World,

I am writing this after having eaten an entire family-sized package of chocolate.

Unsurprisingly, I feel sick and once again I am vowing to “never again do this to myself”.

Yes, I am a greedy person.

I think I always subconsciously knew this way true, but this weekend it really became apparent when my bestie pointed it out on our camping trip.

In the span of 48 hours, I had burned my tongue twice from eating hot food.

I was too greedy to have it in my mouth before it cooling down.

One of the times, it was a potato that LITERALLY came right out of a fire.

We went to visit my parents on the way back and she told my mom, who said,

“Yes, Alana has been greedy ever since she was a baby. When she felt the milk wouldn’t come out quick enough, she BIT ME.”

It’s interesting, there are a lot of things that we sort of notice, but not really.

Sometimes it takes an objective person to look at your life to give you some perspective.

Now with this new awareness, I am empowered to change some of my behaviours.

I will notice now when I eat hot food and think that maybe I should wait.

The change in my greed won’t be immediate (see chocolate example above), but I could never change without first being aware of what I am doing.

So it’s good to know the “bad” things about yourself,

Because it lets you decide if it’s something you want to keep,

or something you want to leave behind.

I think the temptation here is to beat yourself up, for having this trait in the first place.

But the truth is, even in the “bad” things, are not bad.

Being greedy also served me in many ways.

It helped me practice obsessively with dance drills and helped me improve really quickly.

It helped me study hard at the things I was interested in.

It helped create a lot of enjoyment.

So I’m grateful for it, I’m grateful that it got me to here.

But I’m ready to move on.

I’m interested to see what other emotions I can use to practice a lot, study hard and create enjoyment, without burning my tongue.

What are some of the traits you have that are not serving you?

Sometimes these can be hard to identify when you are living inside your own life. If you want an outside perspective to help you see what is causing you to metaphorically burn your tongue or feeling sick, I got you.