When You Feel Low
Hello World,
Today I feel really low, and it feels awful. I want to run away from this feeling, I want to numb, I want to push it away. Anything except feel it.
But I also hear myself say, “It’s ok, Alana. It’s ok that you feel this way. It’s ok to let this feeling be here. It’s ok for you to be human. Nothing has gone wrong.” And so, while I am in this difficult experience, I also feel compassion and love for myself. That doesn’t make the negative feeling go away but it means that I am not creating additional suffering by telling myself I shouldn’t feel how I’m feeling. All I know is that I do feel this. At this moment, this is where I need to be. How do I know that? Because this is where I am. This is the truth for me right now.
It’s easy to accept feelings when they feel good, less so when it’s the other way around. But the alternative to accepting your emotions is denying them, and that does not make them go away. I spent a significant part of my life numbing myself - I thought that helped me get rid of the feeling, but what it did was help me ignore myself. The truth is, the negative was always there under the numbing, and while I was numb to the negative, I was also numb to myself.
My instinctive reaction right now is still to escape. But I’ve tried that, and it is not the life I want. I choose my real life. I choose my full human experience, even when it’s hard. I choose to accept my truth, and accept myself always, whether I’m on top of the world, or feel like I am carrying it on my shoulders.
If you are going through something similar, I hear you. Wanting to escape negative feelings is normal, because we were never taught that allowing them was an option, or how to do that. But know this: while negative emotions sometimes hurt, but they can’t harm us. That doesn’t mean they don’t suck sometimes. They suck sometimes! But I want to tell you the same thing I’m telling myself: It’s ok that you feel this way. It’s ok to let the feeling be there. It’s ok for you to be human. Nothing has gone wrong.
You are strong enough to feel any emotion. And you are not alone. Every single human feels negative emotions sometimes. It’s one of the beautiful things that help us to create compassion for others, and for ourselves, when we let it.
You’ve got this, beautiful.
(Note: If your emotions are preventing you from being able to function in your life I absolutely encourage you to speak to a medical professional.)
Coaching focusses on thoughts and belief systems, but also focusses on processing emotion. Without first accepting where we are, it’s difficult to move forward and create an intentional life. If this is something you want support in, I would love to be there for you.